Guilt
by SuperMint
Summary: He did his duty but that doesn't mean he feels good about it.


Horses rushed through the gates, the Prince and the men who had gone out in search of Anna had returned."Princess Anna?" He asked, hopeful that the girl had been found. Prince Hans shook his head.

"We did not find her but I have found someone else." He shifted a little and revealed the other burden on his horse. A pale hand slipped down and a platinum braid followed.

"Queen Elsa!" He hurried to help her down but the stern look of the prince and the men halted his action.

"She needs to be… held securely." Hans said. His intention writ clear in tone and expression. "She nearly killed two men and this unnatural winter is proof enough of the danger she poses.

He felt anger, indignation build up but the Prince was royalty and placed in charge until Anna returned. "I know of a place." He replied and once more stepped forward to take the Queen from the horse. She had been tied to it like any old luggage and it took every inch of his decorum to not punch those responsible down.

She was so light in his arms, for a moment he thought back to the little girl who played piggyback ride when her father was too busy, to the young woman who had slunk from her room and fallen asleep weeping in front of a veiled portrait and needed carrying back to bed.

He was not taking her to her bed now.

They made careful progress through the castle to the palace. He led the men to a door mostly unused by staff and residents, the direct door to the cells. He selected one close to the palace living space, albeit underneath, it was dryer and warmer. Idly he wondered if Elsa really felt the cold. One of the guards shifting a chain caught his attention again.

"You will know when they are needed." The king had said those words as he had shown him where the special measures were stored. Even now the key sat at his belt, bunched with all the others.

"I have something we will require. I shall return with it shortly." He told the Prince, walking past and taking care he was not followed. In the King's Study was a cupboard, locked tight. Inside was a sack, tied just as the day it had been sealed away. He left with it and the objects it contained.

"Just where are you going and what is that?" His wife caught him in the hallway.

"They have found Elsa." Was all he could say. Her face fell as she realised the import of his words, the contents of the bag in his hand.

"Very well. What of Anna?" she schooled her expression, to act as hi support as ever.

"They did not find her." He sighed, and clasped her hand gently. "She will return, she is strong willed."

"I'll make sure we have some hot chocolate ready." His wife said, tacit agreement that the girl would return. She bustled away to the kitchens and he carried on to the cells.

There was a shelf of blankets near the doorway; he picked one up for Elsa. She might not really need it but it would help him feel a little more caring for her, considering what he was about to do.

The Prince had left the cells, the men in his party too. A guard was posted at the door and he saluted before unlocking the door.

Elsa lay on the bare bunk; her face was peaceful, un-tormented in her unconscious state. The bile rose as he opened the sack and removed the heavy iron bindings. They strung though the chain easily, locked into place with the sturdy length. The shackles were opened with a key, marked inside for each hand; they had been designed to fit like a glove.

She slept on even as he lifted her hands; her slim, porcelain pale hands. Un-gloved for the first time in over a decade and he was about to lock them away. But it had to be done. When the shackles were locked into place he carefully arranged her arms for comfort, she would at least be unharmed by the bindings until she woke.

He hurried away then, not wishing to risk waking her, not to risk seeing those blue eyes looking at him during his act of betrayal. Not to risk seeing her fear, sadness and hurt at what he had done.

After the events that followed, when Anna returned and was given into the hands of one who would harm her. When she had saved her sister from Hans, when she revealed the prince's plan to all. After Elsa was finally freed from her self-imposed chains and held in a sisterly embrace. When the Queen took her throne and gave her edict against closing the gates, reunited with her sister whose love saved them both. He could only sit in his study in the palace rooms he lived in with his wife.

"Hans wanted to murder her Gerda." He looked at the fireplace, not lit in the summer. "He left Anna to freeze to death. If her magic had not been strong enough Elsa would have died in chains."

"You did what we thought best Kai." Gerda tried to comfort her husband, "They were the King's instructions."

"Elsa would have died in chains I put her in." Kai said quietly, the sobering thought burning guilt into his mind. He had seen her in the courtyard looking so joyful and free. He had heard her laugh and it broke his heart that his deeds were nearly her undoing.

"You could tell her what was done, why it had to happen." Gerda knew it would not be enough to comfort him.

"No. I betrayed her the moment I unlocked that cupboard." Kai looked at his wife again. "I will serve her now and never betray her again. If I tell her I will not have a chance to fix this grave mistake."

"As you say." Gerda never could change his mind when it was made up.

Time passed and they more than made up for the lapse, so Gerda thought, even if Kai was slow to let go of the guilt.

* * *

This can read as a separate story or as an aside to Becoming Free. I have had many positive comments about Kai and I was writing him in the best traditions of fictional butler's everywhere. From Jeeves of J&W, Alfred Pennyworth, Norman Burg ,Wilikins and Sebastian Beach.

Then I realised, he was formerly the aide of the king. He had been kept on past the accident and would have known all he needed to do his job.

Someone had to have put Elsa in chains but that someone also thought to put a blanket over her, to lay her on the bunk in some semblance of comfort. They had to care, to not see her as a monster or an obstacle and the guests wouldn't have, certainly not Hans and the Duke.

Then came the question : Who in the palace would have known about the shackles?

Kai would, but he would also have cared for Elsa.

I wrote this fic from all that swirling idea/realisation I had stirred up. I hope no one thus thinks all the awesome Kai was up to in Becoming Free was guilt fuelled; he is still a butler/aide of the finest quality and cares for his charges greatly. I'd just put it that some of the more unusual goings on (Like talking walking snowmen and reindeer buddies) were brushed over by his sensibilities to make up for the wrongdoing he thought he had commited.

Because really, Elsa was safe and cared for in those moments where others had been seeking to kill her right away and the chains would have gone a long way to quiet objections to her still having a pulse.

Anyway. More nice feels in some other stories. Promise.


End file.
